Christianity Spoof

It's funny what you find when trying to spend a gift card at Barnes and Noble. I had been searching for a particular pair of books, when a week or so ago I was finally able to find one of those books (And Baby Makes Three). Not able to locate the other book and having a bit more cash on the card I did what I do. I want to browsed the Christianity and Philosophy sections. It was there I found a great little book by Tom Breen (a.k.a. the Internet Theologian). I honestly had not heard of Tom nor his book, but it looked somewhat interesting so I got it. Well let me tell you it is far more hysterical than I could have imagined. Tom's approach to understanding Christianity in our modern/post-modern/pop culture reminds me of one Dave Barry or the History of Baseball that my buddy Rich wrote as his senior writing project back at the CCI, only without the llamas. It helps if you have are conversant with church history and pop culture as Tom's humor is reference oriented. There are moments where some might want to google or wiki some of his references, but it is well worth the read. I have not laughed out loud while reading book in some time, granted I am taking a Statistics class at this point, which might contribute to the lack of humor in my literary diet, but none the less, Tom's take off on pop cultures view of Christianity is quite funny and at times really finds its mark skewering both pop culture and the Church where we need it most.

Obscure Baseball Team Names

Yup, as bit more on baseball this morning. Fantasy baseball impacts the way we watch the sport in a number of ways. You start to follow players rather than teams. You find yourself rooting for a pitcher from one team and a batter from another. Perhaps a less known impact is how the search for just the right team name can alter your knowledge of baseball. For a number of years now I have been naming my teams after existing or formerly existing franchises. I have used the Yuma Scorpions, Las Vegas 51s, Syracuse Chiefs, among others. So I thought I would post a list of some of the odder names I have come across in my searches for just the right name for my teams. Those on the list in bold are ones that I have used.

1. Asheville Tourists
2. Atlanta Black Crackers
3. Edmonton Cracker Cats
4. Fresno Raisin Eaters
5. Great Lakes Loons
6. Greenville Drive
7. Hickory Crawdads
8. Indianapolis Clowns
9. Lehigh Valley IronPigs
10. Montgomery Biscuits
11. Nashville Sounds
12. Savannah Sand Gnats

Baseball Time Again

Thought I would find a few baseball videos to get us all in the mood for baseball season. I have been listening to Angels games the past few nights and my wife will be at the home opener tonight, but I thought I would offer these videos up to help get the rest of us ready to go. Enjoy!

Will It Blend?

Baseball Tennis

Jedi Baseball

Men & Women

Dennis Prager launched a new dedicated hour of programing yesterday. He has been running a weekly Happiness Hour and Ultimate Issues Hour. Yesterday he added the Male/Female Hour. Callers questions and Dennis's comments focus around understanding the difference between men and women that has so often been downplayed in the media and social sciences. To get an idea of where Mr. Prager will be going with this new hour take a listen to his first crack at it.

Male/Female Hour #1

Foolishness Averted

The Los Angeles City Council managed to avoid complete foolishness by rejecting a proposal for a ban on violence as a way to commemorate the assassination of Martin Luther King Jr. The proposed 40 hour ban on murder and violence was quickly identified as silliness. Why would a murderer respect a call for 40 hours of peace (which was the goal) if the general laws against murder fail to work as a deterrent? The concept created by Los Angeles author and political commentator Earl Ofari Hutchinson sought to gradually bring an end to violence. "If this works, then the next logical thing is: If a city like Los Angeles can go 40 hours without one homicide, then why not 40 days?" said Hutchinson. By some fortune the members of the City Council were not fooled into thinking that just asking would work where the law and law enforcement has failed. For the complete story check out LA Times.

McCain on Letterman

I found a clip of McCain on Letterman from the Late Show last night. Letterman starts with a series of "You look like.." jokes only to have McCain come out and return fire with his own series of similar jokes. But watch closely the funniest thing is not the jokes, but the brief bit where McCain puts his hands in his pockets and does the little rock back on your heels moment that Letterman does almost as a nervous tick through out his monologues.

Drive Thru Church

You never know just what you will find when you do a search on youtube. I put "church" in this afternoon and found a pair of videos that take a shot at our American "quick and easy" thoughts about church. They come from two very different churches and hit the same major theme from two different angles. Enjoy!

What's in a name?

This afternoon while eating lunch, I was reading through Exploring the History & Philosophy of Christian Education and enjoying a Reuben as Arby's. In a chapter on Christian Education in Colonial America a table lists a series of inventors and their inventions, some trivial and some of lasting importance. The first gentleman on the list grabbed my attention. Not because of who he was or what he invented, but with the British Prog-Rock band that named themselves after him. Jethro Tull invented the seed-planting drill in 1701. This Jethro Tull's invention improved agriculture by increasing the number of seeds that germinated when sown. The story of the band's name involves the suggestion of their agent, who was a history major. The band hit upon their first success under that name and thus stuck with it.

New Deadly Sins

It's been in the news that the Catholic Church has released a list of a new set of Seven Deadly Sins. 1500 years after the first list, we finally get the much anticipated Seven Deadly Sins II Collection.

The original deadly sins:
1. Pride
2. Envy
3. Gluttony
4. Lust
5. Anger
6. Greed
7. Sloth

The new deadly sins:
1. ``Bioethical' violations such as birth control
2. ``Morally dubious'' experiments such as stem cell research
3. Drug abuse
4. Polluting the environment
5. Contributing to widening divide between rich and poor
6. Excessive wealth
7. Creating poverty

Generally I would launch into a commentary here, but a few factors prevent that.

1. No time for that today.
2. No real information as to what exactly each of these is getting at, thus I am not entirely sure what to react to since there is much ambiguity left with the statements as listed.
3. I was satisfied with God's original Ten Commandments.

I did try to find information on the Vatican web-site, but they did not have an up-dates section and a search did not find much. I did however find a section entitled "Vatican Secret Archives." Now that's a well kept secret.

If anyone has sources for a more detailed explanation of the new deadly sins, please post them.

Today in History

Being the nerd that I am I get a daily e-mail about historical events that have taken place related to church history. At the top of today's list is the following:

1452 Johannes Gutenberg (ca. 1398-1468) began printing the Bible with his movable type printing process.

Thanks to his efforts, every home in America can now have a dusty copy of the Bible on their shelves. In honor of Gutenberg's work and those of the Reformers and others who have done so much to ensure that we have access to God's word, why don't we dust off that old book and give it a good read today. For that matter, why stop at today? For a Bible reading plan take a look at http://www.bibleplan.org/.

Lunch for the fast food employee

It is not often that I think about what a lunch break looks like for someone working at McDonald's. This afternoon, I had lunch at my local Farmer Boys, when I noticed that the staff was receiving a pizza delivery. Can't say that I have ever seen that before. I mean I have seen KFC employees in Carl's Jr. and things of the like, but to order food from another company to be delivered to your own is not something I would have thought of. What I am worried about is what that says about the food I was eating. Not sure it reflects on it at all, but I still can't help but wonder a little.

Bus Driver's Prayer

While looking round on the net, trying to kill time, after having finished a draft of a paper for comp exams and not being able to get back in the house off the patio due to the removal of the lower section of our walls (see previous post), I found something called The Bus Driver's Prayer. In typical British fashion the humor is very local and very dry. But you might find it an interesting parody of the Lord's Prayer.

Our Farnham,^[1] who art in Hendon

Harrow be Thy name.

Thy Kingston come; thy Wimbledon,

In Erith as it is in Hendon.

Give us this day our daily Brent ^[2]

And forgive us our Westminster^[3]

As we forgive those who Westminster against us.^[4]

And lead us not into Thames Ditton^[5]

But deliver us from Yeovil.^[6]

For Thine is the Kingston, the Purley and the Crawley,^[7]

For Esher and Esher.^[8]

Crouch End.

Our very own Poseidon Adventure

Last night, upon returning home from work, I had planned a relatively simple evening. I was considering what to have for dinner and thinking I would get a chance to take a spin on our exercise bike. Instead what I found was a living room under water. The hose coming from the toilet in the down stairs bathroom had failed and detached from the wall. This launched water all over the bathroom and then across the living room. Under the walls into the laundry room, then into the kitchen. The water then made its way under that walls of both of our neighbors and also began to spill out of both our doors and slider. What I came home to was a house, where the city had already shut off the water, thus allow the water to receed, through upon pulling up I could still see where the water had run out the door and down the alley toward the street. The neighbors were quickly around to tell me about the work done to shut off the water, and full of questions about what happened, even before I was able to get much of a handle on the situation. Having verified that the water was indeed off, I went to the garage to get our push broom, with a squeegee attachment. After a few minutes of pulling water out, I call Andrea to ask her for help. When she answered the phone I said "Hey, honey, can I ask you for a favor?" Sounds like a safe kind of thing to ask, little did she know that I would then ask her to call a plumber and explained the situation. She called the insurance company first, then contacted her mother for ideas on a plumber to call. When she arrived home, I had most of the water out. By the time the guys from Service Master came to finish the drying job, just about all that standing water was gone. All that was left was under the flooring. So up came the floor and off came two doors and all the floor boards. So, now we have the noise of the gentle hum of 9 blowers and 3 dehumidifiers to lull us to sleep at night. What a fun adventure. It will be interesting to see what the place looks like after things are dried out, the insurance adjuster comes, and we find out just what we will have to use to put the place back together.

Jolt - Yes it's still around

I think it was about a decade ago that I found a six pack of 16 Jolt bottles at a liquor store in Mission Viejo. Since that time I had been under the impression that you could not get Jolt anymore. No more of that odd cola taste and enough caffeine to make your heart stop. Well a couple days ago while following links from Manuka's Place, I discovered that not only is Jolt still on the market but that you can now get additional flavors of the stuff.

They have changed the look, now being sold in the trendy energy drink bullet can, and added flavors like Cherry Bomb, Blue Raspberry, and Wild Grape. You can even get Jolt wearables, just to make sure you are at the pinnacle of cool.

The additional fun part about the source by which I found the Jolt web-site was through a site for the World Adult Kickball Association. Nice! The combination of the two just has to be spectacular. Caffeine heads flailing legs in a desperate hope to relive grade school glory, I'm in. Oh, wait, I forgot I don't run. Can I sign up to be all time kicker? Do they have that? I know playground football had all time quarterbacks, so why not.

Oh, yes, let me not forget, Jolt also has gum. Cool now you can double up!

The War Solution

I am sure that you have all seen those great pithy bumper stickers that say "War Never Solves Anything." Well today on my way to the office I saw and even better one. In large print on the bottom it said "War Never Solves Anything." Above that in smaller lettering it read, "Except for ending slavery, fascism, nazism, and communism." Finally a bumper sticker with content.

Reflector Vest Guys

I want to get one of those nifty little reflector vests that the Cal-Trans and other city workers get to wear. I want one in order that I might test out a theory that I have been developing today after having nearly hit a guy in one and having previously seen another guys in one just about get hit. In both occasions the genius individuals in those nifty little reflector vests walked into on coming traffic with out so much as a care for their own safety or the safety of others who might swerve out of their own sense of concern for them. The first reflector vest guy, walked out from behind the parked construction vehicles that he and others were working from on Orangethorpe. He was crossed from the construction blocked lane into on-coming traffic, and back behind another truck parked on the side of the road. The entire group of us funneling through that single lane slowed as the person in front tried to not clip this city worker. I four cars back did the same to avoid the car in front of me.

The second occurrence took place as I turned left off of Beach Blvd. onto La Mirada Blvd. on my way to school. There were a pair of guys in the left turn lane loading cones onto the front of their truck. As I turned onto La Mirada Blvd. They finished and one went to enter his car on the passenger's side the other on the driver's side. I did not see if he even looked toward where I was coming. He seemed to just step out around the front of his truck, out in front of me and then start to reach for the door handle as I swerved slightly between his vested-self and the cars in the turn lane to my right.

So, now the question is, why do I want a reflector vest of my very own. Well, what I want to discover is if the brazen actions of these two guys come from sort of a super power given to them by the vest or whether people just naturally avoid them so much that they begin to believe that they can just walk anywhere and no one will get close to them. The vests seem to act like some sort of bumper repellent and I just want to understand how.

Refashioning the Trinity

What follows is not really news, but since I only managed to find out about this myself today, I thought I would pass it along, just in case I am not the only one to have missed this. You would think that such a central and fundamentally bedrock doctrine like the Trinity would not be up for debate. Well if that was what you thought, and I certainly did, the Presbyterian Church, USA set out to prove you & I wrong at their last General Assembly back in June of 2006. A paper was presented by The Theological Issues and Institutions Committee of the 217th General Assembly and approved that "affirms Father, Son and Holy Spirit as the church's anchor language for the Trinity, but lifts up other biblical images of the Trinity for study and use in worship."

The Trinity has been a doctrine in solid standing in the church for many centuries. Church fathers defended its inclusion along with other doctrines of the church such as the divinity of Christ arguing that God reveals Himself as Father, Son, and Holy Spirit in the pages of the Bible. Early heresies such as modalism claimed that God merely appears in three forms but is not indeed three persons in one God. The early church father vigorously defended the Trinity as a doctrine of truth, based exclusively on the identification of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit in the pages of the Bible.

So, what then are these "biblical images" that the PCUSA saw fit to include in their understanding of the Trinity.

• Mother, Child, and Womb.
• Lover, Beloved, Love
• Creator, Savior, Sanctifier
• Rock, Redeemer, Friend
• King of Glory, Prince of Peace, Spirit of Love

Is your head hurting yet? What are the issues with using these descriptors. Let's take them one at a time.

• Mother - God reveals Himself as Father, not Mother. Seeking to be inclusive should not try to correct God's self identification or expand upon it.
  
• Child - Sure Christ was at one time a child, but He did not remain as such, though for all eternity He remains the Son.
  
• Womb - This is a place and not a person.
  
• Lover - Are we then the Father's lovers? Kind of an incestuous implication.
  
• Beloved - Jesus was the Father's beloved, but my own name means Beloved.
  
• Love - True God is love, but why is the Holy Spirit given this as a name?
  
• Creator - The Apostles' Creed does call the Father "creator of heaven and earth," yet the early church fathers still saw fit to use Father as a name or title and creator as merely a descriptor.
  
• Savior - One ought not deny that Jesus is Savior. I just also believe that one also ought not shy away from using the name Jesus Christ. That is the name that is the stumbling block, not the concept of a savior in general.
  
• Sanctifier - Yes, this is part of what the Holy Spirit does, but again it is limited in its scope in helping one understand the Holy Spirit.
• Rock - With apologies to Dwayne Johnson that is an object not a name.
  
• Redeemer - Again I would not deny that Jesus is our Redeemer, but as with Savior why does this change help?
  
• Friend - Once again why is the Holy Spirit the one singled out at a friend to the exclusion of the others (remember that the core of the Athanasian Creed teaches not only the unity of the Trinity but also the ways in which each member is distinct from the others)
  
• King of Glory - Was the Son not also called King?
  
• Prince of Peace - Same as with Savior and Redeemer, this is a title that is biblical but limited in scope for use in worship as such.
  
• Spirit of Love - I am not sure what to do with this. A bit new-agey to me.
  

As you can see the last version (and the 3rd) of the Trinity that the PCUSA approved for worship is the least troubling, and I would say the most "biblical." Still I cannot find a good reason to make this kind of an inclusion. If as the approved paper they believe that "Our need and desire to worship confront us with the inadequacy of our language for God" then I simply would ask why include less adequate language than the original language that God used and commanded us to baptize in. That of course what a point that came up in discussion with my associate pastor, who talked about the discussions of whether to accept a baptism in the name of the Mother, Child, and Womb as valid in seminary last year. Those had to be fun discussions.

A little reminiscence

When you get old friends together for an afternoon the number of random things that come up in conversation can be rather diverse. One item that randomly came up when KDOC was mentioned at the Ducks game yesterday was Wally George. So enjoy a Wally George classic thanks to the kind folks at youtube.

NHL Virgin No More

Until this evening all my live hockey viewing was restricted to minor league games like the Austin Ice Bats and Long Beach Ice Dogs. So tonight when I attended my first NHL game I was not only glad to finally not have to watch a team names partially after the surface they skated upon, but also for the grand welcome I received to NHL hockey. Rich had a pair a great seats to a game at the Honda Center between the Ducks and Blackhawks. Like a few years ago when I attended a game at legendary Wrigley Field for a Cubs game, my inaugural NHL game could not have been better. The Ducks jumped out to a first period 3-1 lead. En route to this lead the new rough, classic hockey character to the post-Disney Ducks was shown in a first period fight. The second period was much less eventful, but the third period returned to the early form of the first with gusto. A series of penalties allowed the Blackhawks to crawl their way back into the game brining the score to 4-3. Within seconds of that third Blackhawk goal, Teemu Selanne responded with his third of the night. First game first hat trick. One more goal was on its way not a minute later brining the game to its final score of 6-3. In addition to the fast paced offensive display that last period was also marked with a return to the rough and tough swaggard of the first period and included a fight started by the Blackhawks goalie. Seriously there was not much one could have hoped for out of a first NHL game than this.

The National Geographic of the South

Tonight I find myself watching CMT. Yes, you read right, Country Music Television. Much as I tend to mock people who watch train wreck TV, I find that I just can't look away from "My Big Redneck Wedding." Never in my life have I seen so many camouflaged bridesmaid's dresses. Actually let me correct that, I never before dreamed that there ever would be such a thing.

Imagine if you will a wedding where every guest is decked out in hunting attire. Imagine part of the entertainment consisting of chasing down a greased hog by the bride, which of course could not take place until after mud bugging. Imagine a reception in a garage. Imagine centerpieces made out of Budweiser cans. Imaging dinner at the reception being hunted for at the bachelor party. And finally imaging more illegitimate children than teeth. Sadly I don't have to image, I have seen.


To get a taste of the fun check out this news report on a couple who took part in this television classic.