The Unintended Consequences of Bad Commercials

As Madison Ave advertisers attempt to find ways to sell you and I that latest and greatest useless gizmo, they occasionally strike upon an idea that yields the reverse effect. So here are a list of the advertising techniques that I find the most repellent:

1. The volume of the commercial is well above that of the program or even other commercials.
2. The man, husband, or father in the commercial is the foolish patsy bungling his way through life.
   
3. Anything sold by Billy Mays.
4. Medications that I have to ask my doctor about.
5. Anti-smoking ads that lack the ability to understand basic logic.
6. German auto makers telling me about how they have dealt with years of high gas prices and that their solution is a car I also cannot afford.
   
7. Brendan Fraser movies.
   

Crunk is dead! All drink Crunk!

You know how a trend gets so trendy that silly product connections start to crop up causing purists to consider even the original to be rendered a mockery. Well, just like the "Extreme" got run into the ground, "Crunk" is well on its way to that abysmal grave site. "Crunk" is now an energy drink. All I want to know is if it comes with a pimp cup.

PETA

For years my buddy Rich and I have joked about the creation of our own PETA T-shirts. Only instead of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals our PETA would be People for the Eating of Tasty Animals. Well, so far we have been all talk. Perhaps someday we might actually get a design at least. In the meantime enjoy this T-shirt I found at www.thoseshirts.com.

It's only a model